Hi. My name is Kristi and I'm an addict

I lead a pretty clean life. Ive never been into drugs. I rarely drink anymore, and when I do it is in moderation (unless it involves fishbowls and then moderation is thrown out of the proverbial strip mall window). I don't smoke. Don't drink coffee.

My one vice in life - my one bad habit, is my addiction to Diet pop.

(soft drink
n. In both senses also called soda pop; also called regionally cold drink, drink; Also called pop, soda; Also called soda water, tonic.
A nonalcoholic, flavored, carbonated beverage, usually commercially prepared and sold in bottles or cans.)

My relationship with pop spans at least a decade. I always knew I had a problem with my love of diet pop. When you have to go to the grocery store simply to buy pop, you know you drink too much pop.

Tonight, I discovered that my addiction is real. I need to sit in a group of people, hold hands, chant and tell my story.

My name is Kristi, and I am a pop-aholic.

I went to the kitchen to pour myself a glass of you guessed it - Diet Coke. A brand new 2-Liter of cold Diet goodness.

Somehow, the bottle slipped out of my hands before I could open it, and it bounced across my kitchen floor. I picked it up and saw that yummy foam rising inside the bottle, but decided it wasn't enough to make it explode. Wait a few minutes, tap the cap, and I should be good to go. Right? So, I pointed the bottle towards the sink (just in case) and slowly unscrewed the cap.

Then, all hell broke loose. That Diet Coke blew up. I turned my head and tried to aim it into the drain, but it didn't stop the flow of foamy lava. I felt my t-shirt become saturated. It was unstoppable. Finally, the explosion died down and I stepped back to look at the damage.

My kitchen was COVERED with Diet Coke. Completely covered. The counter; covered. My stove; covered. The refrigerator including pictures Russell, Emma and Ethan drew; covered. The hardwood floors; a nice thin layer of Diet Coke.

And I knew my addiction was real when the first thing I did was pick up the bottle and look to see if there was any left to drink. I poured the last few ounces left over into my glass and drank it. Then I was ready to clean up the mess.